One of my friends told me, ' You know you're an adult, when you can order a full cake with no reason to celebrate.'
It sounded a little far fetched to me, but tonight as I picked up a book that should have held my attention I realised what I was really craving was cheese and crackers, at 2:38 am. I walked to the kitchen, pulled out a coffee mug and filled it with wine, pulled out a few crackers and walked back to my room. I sat down on my bean bag, wishing it were a couch, and began to read, two pages later, I looked around me, my desk had a pile of paper (so daunting a pile, that, I refuse to go through it), my coffee mug had wine in it, the fan was on but I was wearing warm, fuzzy socks, the leaves were rustling in the breeze, outside my window and there was certain calm in the ticking clock, the arms of which were stuck at an odd angle (I had forgotten to replace the battery, again, I don't even know what I've been so busy with), the calendar pages were still displaying February and in that moment I felt like one of those women, the ones you see in movies, stuck in the monotony of everyday existence, sitting on the balcony(or maybe some deserted cafe, away from people, yet right in the middle of the bustle), holding a book, sipping wine, lighting a cigarette, a slow smile, a lost countenance, with their feet resting on a table.
What I think of most right now is, when did the hand-beaten coffee turn into wine, the origins of which have no value(unless, of course you're one of those that can afford one those bottles with a fancy label), when did it become so normal to walk to fridge and pull out a wine bottle at two in the morning, that too, on a Sunday night! When did I start owning a wine bottle? When did we stop caring? why did these things begin to bother us? And if not, why didn't these things bother us? Was it just me? Was it a problem with our entire generation because when you come to think of it, we were all ordering those cakes without occasion, we're all sipping wine out of coffee mugs (a mug of chardonnay, perhaps?) at odd hours. When did we begin looking for assistance to escape into the world our books create, when did it change from books being an escape, one where just books were enough? When did we start requiring externals to feel that internal happiness? What is it with us millennials, are we growing up to soon? or are we growing up so fast that even we don't realise it? I don't know the answer to most of these questions, but maybe, just maybe, these are things we don't want to realise, we aren't ready to realise.
It sounded a little far fetched to me, but tonight as I picked up a book that should have held my attention I realised what I was really craving was cheese and crackers, at 2:38 am. I walked to the kitchen, pulled out a coffee mug and filled it with wine, pulled out a few crackers and walked back to my room. I sat down on my bean bag, wishing it were a couch, and began to read, two pages later, I looked around me, my desk had a pile of paper (so daunting a pile, that, I refuse to go through it), my coffee mug had wine in it, the fan was on but I was wearing warm, fuzzy socks, the leaves were rustling in the breeze, outside my window and there was certain calm in the ticking clock, the arms of which were stuck at an odd angle (I had forgotten to replace the battery, again, I don't even know what I've been so busy with), the calendar pages were still displaying February and in that moment I felt like one of those women, the ones you see in movies, stuck in the monotony of everyday existence, sitting on the balcony(or maybe some deserted cafe, away from people, yet right in the middle of the bustle), holding a book, sipping wine, lighting a cigarette, a slow smile, a lost countenance, with their feet resting on a table.
What I think of most right now is, when did the hand-beaten coffee turn into wine, the origins of which have no value(unless, of course you're one of those that can afford one those bottles with a fancy label), when did it become so normal to walk to fridge and pull out a wine bottle at two in the morning, that too, on a Sunday night! When did I start owning a wine bottle? When did we stop caring? why did these things begin to bother us? And if not, why didn't these things bother us? Was it just me? Was it a problem with our entire generation because when you come to think of it, we were all ordering those cakes without occasion, we're all sipping wine out of coffee mugs (a mug of chardonnay, perhaps?) at odd hours. When did we begin looking for assistance to escape into the world our books create, when did it change from books being an escape, one where just books were enough? When did we start requiring externals to feel that internal happiness? What is it with us millennials, are we growing up to soon? or are we growing up so fast that even we don't realise it? I don't know the answer to most of these questions, but maybe, just maybe, these are things we don't want to realise, we aren't ready to realise.
Well, girl thats a candid and a brutally honest piece of creativity.. well written.. kudos!
ReplyDeleteThis sure is GRADUATION from coffee to wine.
ReplyDelete